How to thank your housewarming guests

Twenty people came to our housewarming and nineteen of them brought something. A neighbour brought a cordless drill, which we still use every month. A thank-you text the next morning felt a bit thin against a drill. A small gift back closes the loop, and it does not have to cost much; most of what follows is under 10 a head.

Cheap gifts that still feel like a gift

A small plant does the job better than anything bought in a shop. A pot of basil, a succulent from the market, a cutting from the monstera in your new living room. It fits the occasion, since you are the one who just put down roots, and it costs a few euros.

If you would rather make something, a jar of jam, a bottle of chilli oil or a tin of biscuits says you spent an afternoon on it. For something they will use, a candle, a bag of coffee beans, a bar of good soap or a wool throw all work. Better still, buy from the street you now live on: honey from the farm shop, a loaf from the bakery on the corner, a print from the woman who sells at the Saturday market. It thanks the guest and introduces them to the neighbourhood in one go.

The note is the part they keep

Write a card by hand and name the thing they brought, or a moment from the evening. "Thanks for the drill, it has already hung six shelves" beats "thank you for coming" every time. It does not have to be long. It has to be specific.

Photos hold up well too. A print of the group on the stairs in a cheap frame, or an album sent round afterwards, works for nearly everyone. If you like making things, coasters with a picture of the new front door are a keepsake that gets used.

For close friends, build a small bag around what you know about them. Beans and a mug for the one who drinks four coffees a night, seed packets and gloves for the one who spent the whole party in your garden.

Send them within two weeks

Two weeks after the party is the window. Sooner looks rushed, later looks like an afterthought. Put a Sunday afternoon aside and do them all at once.

Wrapping matters a little. Brown paper and string look homemade in the good way, and a small box the guest can reuse for the sock drawer is better than a gift bag. Put the card inside the parcel, because the card is what people keep.

For the friends who live far away, pack anything breakable properly and slide a photo from the evening in with the card. A parcel with a picture in it still feels personal from three hundred kilometres.

When a gift for everyone is too much

Not everyone can send twenty parcels, and after the cost of moving, most people should not. There are other ways to say thank you.

Cook dinner for the ones who helped carry boxes, or host a games night once the sofa has arrived. Hospitality is the thank-you a housewarming is built on anyway. For the guest who cares about a cause, a donation in their name says more than soap. For your closest friends and family, a message with photos from the party and a phone call the week after counts for as much as anything in paper.

Keep a drawer for next time

You will host again, probably by the first summer. Keep three or four things in a drawer, a candle, a bar of chocolate, a soap set, so you are not running to the shop after every dinner.

It also helps to create a wishlist before the next party. Guests then know what you would actually like, nobody brings a fifth chopping board, and you know exactly who gave what when it is your turn to say thank you.