How to keep the gifts straight when five birthdays fall in six weeks

Some families get all their birthdays in one stretch: a father, a sister-in-law and two nephews between the 20th of April and the 5th of June, plus a couple of colleagues who happen to fall in the same weeks. Once four or five birthdays pile up like that, it gets hard to remember who wanted what, and somebody ends up with a candle for the second year running. This is the system that gets a busy stretch done without forgetting anyone.

Ask every one of them for a list, early

The moment you notice the cluster on the calendar, ask each person to create a birthday wishlist and follow it. Do it in March, when there is time. By the week when two parties and a school play share a Saturday, it is too late.

For the ones who refuse to make a list (there is always an uncle), keep your own note: the date, the things they have mentioned wanting, and a rough budget. Laying it out early means you see the whole season at once, which beats discovering it one panicked week at a time.

Sort people into three budgets

Not every birthday deserves the same effort, and pretending otherwise is how the money runs out by the third one. Split the calendar into three groups:

• Partner, parents, children and the two or three closest friends: the higher budget and the personal gift
• Good friends, cousins, in-laws: a moderate budget and something chosen with a bit of care
• Colleagues and acquaintances: a small budget and something that works for anyone

Then the time follows the money. A few evenings go into finding the right thing for a partner's 40th; ten minutes and a bar of good chocolate cover the colleague from accounting.

Buy in batches

Group the purchases by shop and buy three or four gifts in one go. One trip per birthday costs four separate evenings, and usually four delivery charges on top.

Block one weekend at the start of the busy stretch for buying, wrapping and writing the cards, all at once. The wrapping paper comes out once, and nobody is hunting for sticky tape at seven on a party morning.

Keep one record for the whole season

A notebook or a note on the phone, it does not matter, as long as there is one place that holds:

• Every date and the age they are turning
• The gift idea and where to buy it
• The budget and what was actually spent
• The party details and whether you have replied
• Which cards have gone and which gifts have been handed over

It stops the double purchase and the "did we send a card?" conversation. After a few years, it also tells you what each person actually liked, which is rarely what you guessed the first year.

Group gifts and joint parties

When the season gets too much, propose a group gift. Six people putting in 20 each for a record player lands better than six separate small gifts, and nobody has to think of something on their own.

If three birthdays in one circle of friends fall within a fortnight, suggest one party. For big birthdays in particular, most people would rather have one full room than three half-empty ones, and it saves everyone two Saturdays.

Write down what worked for next year

When the stretch is over, take five minutes to note what went well. Maybe the experiences, the concert tickets and the spa afternoon, were easier than parcels. Maybe starting two months out was the thing. Write it in the same record, so next spring does not start from zero. And note which cards landed: one that says a specific thing about the person, with a modest gift chosen with some thought, beats an expensive thing bought at the station the night before.

Ask everyone with a birthday coming up for their wishlist now, while the calendar is still quiet. You can create a birthday wishlist for your own birthday too, so the people who are stuck for ideas for you get the same help.